February 14, Valentine’s Day. It’s that time of year again where either you
are with someone or alone. No matter
what situation you are in, Valentine’s Day can be quite stressful and I’m here
to help relieve some of those unwanted feelings.
If you are the person who doesn’thave that someone special in your life then there are some simple mentalities
you need to have to de-stress your Valentine’s Day. First, you cannot sulk and feel downtrodden
over the fact that you don’t have a boy/girlfriend because the truth of the
matter is, there are so many people that still love you. Spend time with your family on this day and
be surrounded by those who do love you, including pets! Try to no focus on the romantic part of
Valentine’s Day and be grateful for all you have. It’s stressful to see some of your friends
with their partner, but realize that there are many of your friends who don’t
have anything to do on that day either and that you should try to be with them
as well, (unless you enjoy family time more).
A completely different idea on how to deal with the stressful Valentine’s
Day is to completely ignore it and pretend that it doesn’t exist. Just live that day like any other Thursday in
your life and don’t even fret about the events that go on during that day. Don’t falter from your regular routine and
zone out the love birds that are obnoxiously swooping and swooning around
you. Find the people who love you, the
people who care, or just choose ignore it all, and I guarantee your Valentine’s Day won’t
be stressful.
Not every is necessarily alone on
this day and for those of you who do have that significant other, it can be quite
the stressful day. For the guys, I know
that you are expected to bring a bouquet of roses and hearts of chocolate and
take your girl out to a fancy dinner and be all romantic and perfect. But it’s the last word that causes all the
stress: perfect. Being perfect is impossible
and you need to accept the fact that you will not be perfect. Tradition states that you need to heighten
your romanticism, but to what extent is the question, a question that you need
to have with your partner. Make expectations. You should be comfortable enough with your
significant other to be able to ask how Valentine’s Day should be spent, what
they find romantic so you don’t have to guess, and just their overall feelings
on the holiday (they might even despise it!)
For the girls, I understand that you like spontaneous and extravagant,
but lower your expectations. Don’t
stress over whether or not you will get flowers, but as odd as it may sound,
have low expectations, that way if your boyfriend decides to do that extra
something, then you will be twice as happy and certainly feel no stress. Communication is key for any stress-free
relationship, especially during Valentine’s Day. In addition, if your partner only sees your
love on Valentine’s Day then you have not been doing a good enough job the rest
of the year. Remember to not “make it
into a huge test. Express your love every single day and you will be better off
in the long run." Have a stress-free,
happy Valentine’s Day.
I really like what you have to say about appreciating the people you have around you: your friends, family, even pets. A girlfriend or boyfriend may not be there a couple months from now. Love relationships are often short lived, but your family and friends love you no matter what. Aren't those the relationships we should celebrate? Love relationships are often the most celebrated and people often fret over them the most, but the most time and care should be put into relationships that last. We are only in high school, so marriage is far off. My time is best spent enjoying my friends. With only a semester left with the friends I have grown up with, I plan to take this Valentine's Day to love them. I have plenty of time down the road to stress over a woman.
ReplyDeleteI experienced this similar feeling not only on Valentine's Day this year, but on turnabout last year. A girl did not ask me to turnabout last year and I ended up not going. I felt lonely. However, on that night I decided to spend time with people that actually meant a lot to me, my family. I am a peer group leader and this year we were discussing turnabout with our freshman. I realized not many of them were going. I explained to them that it is okay that they were not going, just like you are saying it is okay not to have a lover on Valentine's Day. I encouraged them to do something with their friends and/or family that truly meant something to them.
ReplyDeleteAs fun as these holidays can be, it sometimes seems like holidays like Valentines Day were created and now shaped to be quite stressful. When you really try to look at Valentines Day for what it is supposed to be, it sounds nice. A day to show your loved ones that you appreciate them, go do something special with family or friends or a significant other, etc. However, expectations, as you mentioned in your post, have gotten so high! And I feel like in many ways, society and the media has made it that way. Between intricate gifts, expensive dinners, and elaborate plans, people are starting to expect these sorts of things every year! This is naturally quite strenuous for whoever is planning the evening and quite costly as well. It seems like more and more we hear about couples breaking up after Valentine's Day or more fights happening. I think this is definitely because of the shift in what these holidays mean to us. They've become more materialistic...almost like you need to do a bunch of elaborate activities to gain another person's love. As you mentioned, people should use the holiday as a time to appreciate the company you have and spend time with others. That seems the most rewarding AND the most stress-free.
ReplyDelete